A while back, a friend asked me to help a friend of theirs in a matter that had spiraled out of control, due in part to the Covid-19 lockdown, depression, but also procrastination. The last two are difficult because they often go hand in hand, and if you have suffered from depression, things that need to be done are left to one side and procrastination can then become a habit. We procrastinate when we don’t want to do uncomfortable things, and put them off as long as possible or hope that something happens so you don’t have to do the deed at all.
It is much harder to procrastinate on the physical plane because we have legal deadlines, and other activities that cannot be put off so we have to grin and bear it and do the deed or suffer the consequences. On a spiritual level, if we procrastinate and opt not to proceed with a Soul lesson that we had chosen, then we can postpone it and pick it up in another incarnation. However, it’s not simply a case of not wanting to learn the lesson, or not being ready but the Soul will only postpone the lesson if the Soul is struggling and to proceed would be counterproductive.
As a Guide, it makes my task all the more difficult if the charges want and need help, but then don’t help themselves by procrastinating or convincing themselves to take the easy way out. That is their choice, but the same lesson will reappear again if they failed to learn the point of the lesson, and while I don’t tell them that directly, I suggest that the easy way out may come back to haunt them if the issue isn’t properly solved. My current charges are testing me, and one even said I was learning from it in terms of learning more patience. Naturally, patience is something we all learn in different degrees whether we want to or not. Their comment didn’t go down well as they were using it as a tactic to justify their procrastination.
How long should I allow them to procrastinate before I call it a day? In this particular case the ramifications are legal, and have resulted in fines, court judgments, bailiffs, and a possible criminal record. You would think that the parties would have a vested interest in proving their innocence, but it has been mired by the fact they they were both fooled by a party they assumed was trustworthy and a friend. Looks are deceptive, and this person had managed to dupe them for several years by telling them what they wanted to hear, and also preyed on their weaknesses. My charges have had to accept they had been taken in, and then had to choose how to learn from that. It has been no easy task as I, on the outside and being a cynical skeptic could see clearly what this person had been doing, and it was in order to commit fraud and to pin it on others.
When you have evidence in front of you that you don’t wish to believe, how do you cope? This is what happened with my charges where I presented the evidence to them that spoke for itself. You can see why many people pay off a situation so they don’t have to admit they made a mistake or were fooled, but that is the easy way out. When people do that, the other party then gets away with it and continues that pattern of behaviour because no one had the courage to admit their mistakes in public. Had others done so previously, it may have avoided others having to suffer.
Procrastination can lead to lessons being delayed, not learnt, and further lessons being necessary to compensate for the original lesson that has now developed beyond the original intention. That is why procrastination can be perilous as you can make the original lesson even harder. While I seek justice and to help where I can, I am also able to let the charges fall if that is their lesson for I would be denying them their lesson if I did everything for them. It gets complicated when there are legal deadlines, and I am a mere Guide where the outcome of a failure to act doesn’t affect me directly.
I have to balance this by supporting them without looking like a bully, and to reprimand them without them crying or having a mental breakdown. It is not easy, and nor do I wish them to become dependent on me as they need to be able to decide what to think and do themselves. I can make suggestions, but the actual decisions are theirs to make. Complications of course arise when they have been dependent on you, and haven’t acted because they claim they were waiting for your approval and before you know it, the deadline is on the horizon and nothing has been done.
Each Soul is responsible for themselves and their choices, and it must be remembered that a Guide does just that and guides. Push a charge too far and they shut down, but if you don’t push them then they become apathetic and dependent. Finding a balance takes time and energy, and that is well and good if the charge is learning and genuinely makes an effort to resolve their situation, but if they aren’t, then IMHO, I would be doing a disservice by propping them up. Like a child riding a bike, you have to let them go at some point so they can learn to do it themselves without help.
Guiding takes up time and energy, and when charges make excuses are they afraid, procrastinating, or trying to find a quick way out of their situation? As a Guide, I am not interested in weak excuses, valid concerns yes, but excuses aren’t necessary because if a charge doesn’t wish to learn then I am content to leave. They don’t need to justify themselves to me, but when they are procrastinating on issues that may affect and harm others, that can be considered a selfish act. People may die, or get scammed based on their decisions, and their lesson is to choose to do the moral thing for the greater good (whether it is a personal sacrifice or not) or choose selfishness. That is their lesson to choose to learn, and not mine, but if they choose the easy and selfish way out, then the same lesson will be repeated again until they choose the unselfish option.
There are no quick and simple lessons to learn when it comes to morals, and ethics, but procrastinating can make the original lesson more complex, because each decision we make affects the paths of others. Thus, while you may be hindering your path and progress through procrastination (that you have convinced yourself it is okay), your actions may have adverse affects on others that you may not even know.
Take for example an agent has conned you out of £10,000, but rather than report it and make them accountable to the authorities by collating the evidence of the fraud, you choose to let it go and write it off as a bad mistake. Because of your decision, that agent then goes on to defraud more people, but this time millions were stolen, where some lost hope and took their own lives. You see, your choice of action affected the paths of others that you didn’t know with tragic consequences because you chose the easy path, and opted not to learn (moral responsibility). When you are presented with options, the easy way is not always the best one to choose, and procrastination merely prolongs what needs to be done.
In my case, I have given the charges to tools they need and it is up to them to use them. If they choose not to use them and fail to prove their innocence, then that is their lesson to learn. That is a marked difference between the physical and spiritual planes—on the physical plane one must produce evidence of innocence, and on the spiritual plane the evidence already exists. You cannot claim to have learned your lesson when you haven’t, because the lessons will continue to present themselves until the lesson is complete.
Procrastination will simply make the lesson more difficult and cumbersome to learn, but then again, that is the choice of the Soul. There comes a point where a Guide can’t keep repeating the same advice and suggestions, and to sit there and listen to the same excuses would be a disservice too, because by not acting it enables the charge into believing it’s acceptable to procrastinate with the same excuses for months. A Guide is not responsible if a charge chooses to procrastinate or make constant excuses, because a Guide can guide, but cannot choose their path.